Losing the physical self

Sometimes hospitals can be very funny places. I guess that’s why there are so many good comedies based on them, anyone who has seen ‘The Green Wing’ recently will testify. Not that we had much to laugh about because Anita was in Stoke Mandeville to have plastic surgery on her eye to tighten the lid. She has had too many infections and if she wishes to keep her sight then she needs to easily blink the right eye.

As we sat in the waiting room we had to fill out the usual consent forms that I have got used to. As Anita signed her name (yes she can do that) I looked around the room at the other victims. I had to suppress a laugh because all of them including Anita had a large arrow drawn on their forehead. I suppose the NHS is making sure that no one operates on another part of the body! The Operation was OK although we don’t know the effect on how her eye will look until the swelling has gone down.

We decided to get a ramp installed as soon as possible to make things easier. We had been given a portable ramp that was very heavy and involved a lot of running around, not much fun when it’s raining. The person doing it had a problem that he had to get round a drain so the ramp had to turn. You can see the finished results in the picture. I would recommend anyone who is in a similar situation to get it done asap as it has made life a lot easier. For wheelchair use the ramp had to have a saftey curb at least 4 inches high and no more than a 1/12 rise.

At the same time we decided to have some decking done at the rear of the house. This means that I can push the wheelchair outside without any problems. For people thinking of having this done it cost around £1200.

Anita told me yesterday that all of a sudden she could feel more in her leg. I tested her out to see if she could feel my hand on her leg and she did indeed respond correctly. She is feeling quite a bit of discomfort in it which from our point of view could be a good thing. When taking her shoe of her left foot she could feel it for the first time.
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Family meetings are basically important discussions that take place around every 6 weeks. They are an opportunity for me and Anita to talk over her progress with the staff. As well as the staff from the rehabilitation hospital it is also attended by a social worker and brain injury specialist from Milton Keynes. Each specialist area reports on how Anita is progressing including Psychology, Speech and Language Therapy (SALT), Nursing, Occupational Therapy (OT) and Physiotherapy.
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A lot of time with Anita is spent trying to convince her that she is improving. She has always been a very impatient person and finds the slowness of the recovery impossible to take. The staff try to do things that demonstrate the progress she has made. I continually find myself repeating phrases that stress the progress, they have become like mantras. You are making proqress, you are getting better. Her emotions are very up and down. She is the strongest person I have ever met in my life. For her to have a negative outlook demonstrates just how tough the situation she is in. I think most people would be overcome as its a mental battle as much as a physical one. And it is one hell of a fight for survival!

Often the challenges we face in life are ones that most reach our vulnerabilities. In Anita’s case two of the things she values most, her freedom and appearance have been savagely attacked.

Today they tested the sensitivity of Anitas left arm. It something that has been done on an off for a long time. Much of the left side of her body and the right side of her face is numb. The good news is that she is getting more feeling in her upper arm. She could feel a cold spoon that was applied.

I have been told by my sister that Anita should have been receiving incapacity benefit because she is only on half pay at work. I should have been sent an SE1 form to fill in back in May after she had been off work for 6 months. Apparently incapacity benefit comes into force after you have been incapable of work for more than 28 weeks.
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A trip to Wycome Hospital was needed to review the condition
of the right eye. There has been several problems with the eye since brain injury, the worst is an inability to close the eyelid. This has led to a dry eye and many, many infections including the notorious MRSA. Back in May a gold weight was inserted into the top eyelid which achieved partial closure and also complete closure when sleeping. Time and time again I’ve looked into that vulnerable bare eye but amazingly we have just been told that it’s not damaged.
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Anita is continuing in her progress of trying to walk again. She has moved on to be assisted by one physio only and a bunch of extras. These extras include a quadrapod to stop her falling over.

She also has her leg fully strapped to support her knee and her foot supported to help it lift at the toe.

Anita has occasionally tried knitting. She says she is knitting a square. Seems straightforward but with brain injury it is like threading a small needle with a chain! She asked for some knitting equipment a while back because a former work customer had told her how she had used knitting to recover from a stroke. The first 3 times she tried to knit she exploded in frustration of not even being able to complete one simple knot (or whatever they are called). She had no movement in her left hand. Eventually over time she completed one knot but today she completed a whole single line of knitting!